The last 4 weeks have been crazy, hectic, emotional, exciting, exhausting…you name it, I’ve felt it. When a situation is forced upon you have 2 choices, fight or flight. I’ve trained my fight response pretty well in the past, it’s why Phoenix Strength even came into existence in the first place, however, it took a certain environment, support network and place in time, to allow that fight response to become something beautiful.
As I realise now, I’ve been fighting for the last 2 years, but for all the wrong reasons and in the wrong way, resulting in some hideous decision making which only now, in the last 4 weeks have I been able to tidy up all those poor decisions and set the plane straight.
Many people have asked me in the last month or so, “Well, what are you going to do?” after an abrupt change in circumstances which meant I was no longer able to operate Phoenix Strength as I had been for the last 2 years (THANK GOD). Honestly, I had absolutely no clue whatsoever. My typical response brushed off concerns to make sure no one knew that really, there was a little burnt out Phoenix quickly turning to ashes inside of me. With no sight of a new fire within, I removed myself from everything completely for 2 weeks.
I spent the first week angry, upset, confused, trying to figure out what my revenge would be to the individuals who has caused this, turns out Karma’s got my back and dealing with that one now itself 😉 . It’s amazing what happens when you remove yourself from external influences, thats people, places, noises, stimulus, everything, and sit with yourself. It’s very difficult to ignore the true, creative voice and life within you.
After a week of punishing anger and blame, I made a shift, all of a sudden I started doing things how I wanted to. So many people had kept telling me how to try do things, offering advice, support, which I am really grateful for, but all of that noise was only distracting me from me. Once I had decided to do things precisely how I wanted to, everything made sense and immediately fell into place. My fire ignited, things started to happen, ideas were flowing quicker then I could write them down, I had a list as long as my arm of things I needed to do, see, sort out, it was pretty overwhelming, which at first scared me, so much as I briefly withdrew. Thankfully, out of the blue, an old face gave immense clarity and confidence to the entire situation, as simple as it sounded, “You know what you need to do, just take it one thing at a time…”, one thing at a time would clear the huge task list. A day later, I’d gone from being completely overwhelmed to falling into a flow state, something I haven’t achieved for years.
By the end of week 2 heading into week 3, I was fighting, fighting back for everything I believed in, creating something out of nothing, literally absolutely nothing. Twice now I’ve experienced these catastrophic changes and it’s only when I’ve allowed myself to be me, and then positioned myself with a handful of confidants, have I been able to fight and create something amazing out of nothing.
I repeatedly tell people on a daily basis, everyday you have a choice, I realise now what that choice comes down to, do you want to fight, fight for what it is you really want and believe in and the immense possibilities, or flight, fly away, run away into the beliefs of others, the standards and environment that currently limits your mindset.
When you put yourself in a position where you’re able to, with clarity, decide on fight or flight, choose to fight for everything you believe in and desire, the results can be truly beautiful.